"We'll marry each other as often as needed"

[ellenkushner]

Bob Morris in the NYTimes: "Being gay and single is becoming the new smoking" - but in the end, it's a terrific personal essay on what it all means, and you should read it.

Comments

[rosefox]

That was tremendously sweet. How lovely.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Imb NOD CRYINK, I jid hab a code in my node!
Thabz by I neeb thib tibbshoes!

[eackerman.livejournal.com]

A sweet essay. Thanks for sharing.

[phoenix64.livejournal.com]

I couldn't help but laugh a bit at, "So it’s like having a parking permit", but isn't a parking permit in NYC kind of a big deal?

Wonderfully sweet, thanks for the link.

[movingfinger.livejournal.com]

"Being gay and single is becoming the new smoking"

That would be standing outside a restaurant or bar furtively indulging at the regulated distance from the doorway. God, I hope not.

[gweneiriol.livejournal.com]

thanks for the link this was a fantastic news piece!

[d-aulnoy.livejournal.com]

Beautiful.

[burgundy.livejournal.com]

I like that a lot. And it's the perfect companion piece to what a friend of mine wrote (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/13/AR2008061303172.html) about the multiple-marriage phenomenon, and what that means for her and her wife.

[mroctober.livejournal.com]

Very depressing.

[ellen-kushner.livejournal.com]

You don't smoke?

[huladavid.livejournal.com]

I've never looked...

[mroctober.livejournal.com]

Well, yes, it's a sweet piece that shows how one can come to appreciate marriage as a personal reminder of the seriousness of a relationship.

But the quoted line about smoking, while clever is just one more jab against those that are single.

Our culture is constantly barraging people with the image that being alone = bad and being coupled = good. I'm both amused and annoyed by male grooming commercials that show when you use the right shampoo or shaving cream you'll get a woman to strike your hair or face.

And in the gay magazines, the only ads with single men tend to be for prescriptions for HIV drugs. Otherwise, the guys are shown laughing with partners or friends.

I just think that while it's great that marriage equality is being achieved by many, it's also a reminder to those of us who have not been able to find love that we're the real inequal citizens.

[kittykatkatja.livejournal.com]

I've often thought that there should be no "legal" marriage, and that joint property ownership should simply be arranged by legal contracts that aren't based on the type of relationship people have. Marriage should reflect a personal committment, utterly separate from tax benefits and property rights.

I still thought it was a sweet piece, though. I don't think anyone should have to be given permission to pledge their hearts to each other, nor should someone who isn't with someone else be penalized for that fact. However, the fact that there are people who aren't in loving relationships shouldn't make us less happy for those who are.

[scbutler.livejournal.com]

Did you see Andrew Sullivan's similar piece in The Atlantic?

Have any women written about this?

[ellen-kushner.livejournal.com]

I didn't see the Sullivan - but "Burgundy," above, has a terrific link to a piece by a woman in the Washington Post.

[scbutler.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the tip. A good piece, with a slightly different take.